From the category archives:

Get Productive

“One reason so few of us achieve what we truly want is that we never direct our focus; we never concentrate our power. Most people dabble their way through life, never deciding to master anything in particular.” ~ Anthony Robbins

Did you know that by the end of January, most people will have failed to keep most (if not all) of their New Year’s resolutions?

So what happens to all that excitement and burning motivation? Why do our great intentions fizzle out so easily?

Perhaps we aim too high. Or maybe the idea is there but the way just isn’t clear – so instead of just picking up and pointing ourselves in the right direction, we feel the fear and creep back to the squidgy spot we were before.

(And it’s still warm. Hmmm, sometimes it’s just more cosy to not have to change anything at all.)

But from my experience,  there is one thing that can totally make or break how successful you are at maintaining the momentum of a new intention. continue reading…

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‘Happiness is a journey, not a destination’.

The beginning of any year can be a turbulent but invigorating place.

It is the time when we pick over the year that was, piercing out the ruts and cracks that have tripped us up and held us back and tied us down; bad habits, unresourceful mindsets, unconciously poor attention to our lifestyles, our bodies, our families and our networks.

But we also have an opportunity to plan anew – to start building something of value instead of focusing on the tearing down of stuff that hasn’t served us.

There is always so much potential nestling in a New Year. We can dream big and wide. We can bust the cubicle apart. We can even plan to dominate the world.

But I want you to think for a moment about those times in your life where something that you have planned to do did not turn out the way you intended. continue reading…

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Well, all I can say is finalmente.

It’s been almost three weeks since the birth of my little boy. Almost 21 days of soothing and rocking and holding and snuggling and swaddling, clutching at spare minutes of sleep and crisis-managing the occasional nappy FAIL.

But I am very pleased to confirm that he is truly scrumptious.

There is nothing more delicious than a newborn baby. There is a certain freshly-baked scent that barely lasts a day or two, but in those first hypnotic days it fills the room like a siren song. I’m sure it’s all part of the charm offensive…

I’m hooked. But I can now, with cast iron certainty, declare…never again.

Three kids?? Why, oh why did I start my blog three months before giving birth to baby three? What was I thinking? Why didn’t someone shake the hell out of me, slap my cheek in a kind of 30s movie style kinda way and say “For God’s sake woman, get a hold of yourself!”

Surely I was trying to do too much?

The truth is, you see, I have never been one to take it easy. If I start spinning a plate, I tend to say “What the hell, let’s spin twelve.” My imagination has always struggled to slow down and wait patiently for my circumstances to catch up, red-faced and puffing and apologising for the mess.

But despite the exhaustion and the guilt and the spinning spinning spinning, I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Because there is only NOW. continue reading…

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tictactoeHave you ever thought about why it really bugs you when your partner leaves the lid off the toothpaste? Or why you are obsessed with being on time while your best friend thinks nothing of always turning up late?

Why does one person live perfectly at ease surrounded by piles of clutter while another would consider it an irritating mess? I remember visiting the flat of an ex-boyfriend for the first time and discovering he basically never washed a dish. Ever. His kitchen sink was like a horror movie. And I just couldn’t understand why that didn’t freak him out.

It was clear that we each had a different set of rules.

Our rules are hugely important in helping us to quickly and easily navigate our way through life. They allow us to shape our reactions to the things we experience and to judge whether we are moving towards things that work or moving away from things we want to avoid.

But we don’t usually choose these rules knowingly – most of them we soak up from our parents, our culture or our education. They may be obvious and mundane – like manners, the highway code or the etiquette of queuing. (Seriously, in the UK it’s an art.) Others are more ethical and moral, such as vegetarianism, or our laws against killing and stealing.

Whether we’re aware of them or not, all of these rules share something in common. continue reading…

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tuningaguitarHave you ever had the kind of day where everything just fell into place? Where you felt great, nothing seemed to phase you and everyone around you was on your side? The day flies by, stuff just gets done, and before you know it you’re falling into bed with a smile on your face, a little amazed at how easy it all was?

Or is it more like a struggle? Squeezing yourself into a space on the train that turns up late, resisting every call you have to make, staring at a blank computer screen or shouting at your kids? Another week of feeling too tired, too stressed, depressed and anxious.

Which “you” sounds more like you? continue reading…

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For champion swimmer Michael Phelps, the difference between going home as the most successful Olympic swimmer of all time and going home as the guy who almost broke the record was a mere 0.01 of a second.

The difference between getting to hold the trophy and getting to stand and watch the guy holding up the trophy? One great shot. continue reading…

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clock

“I’d love to…but I just don’t have the time.” Sound familiar?

Are there things on your To Do list that always get left behind because you never have enough hours in the day? (Assuming you even have a To Do list!)

Or perhaps there’s a book you want to write? Or a subject you want to study? Maybe you’ve always wanted to learn an instrument, or play tennis, or go walking in the mornings, or start practising yoga and meditating…

But finding the time…impossible, right? continue reading…

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You cancel a performance because you’re sick.money
Your students don’t show up for their lessons.
You’re on holiday (I know, like you ever take one.)
Your agent is on holiday (like, all the time.)
You are between contracts. For what seems forever.
You just don’t feel like singing and want to lie down somewhere for a few weeks. (Okay, make that a few years.)

Basically, no matter how glamorous you think your life is, the truth is if you are self-employed and you’re not showing up, then you’re not getting paid. continue reading…

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cheese-mouse

It seems like a very strange question, doesn’t it?

Unless you are already familiar with the book by Dr Spencer Johnson, you will no doubt be thinking more about lunch than about dealing with change.

But if you are feeling frustrated and uninspired, it is definitely time to start thinking about cheese in a very different way… continue reading…

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So, you’ve decided that NOW is the time to change.

You have taken the time to decide what you really want. You’ve written down your goal and you are excited, “juiced”, inspired and elevated. You simply can’t wait to start doing whatever you need to do to make something different in your life.

You take the first step. Easy.

Step two is a little harder but you stick to your guns. Good.

But when it’s time for step three, you’re a little distracted. You press snooze on the alarm and decide that you’ve been so good at going jogging every morning that surely a sleep in won’t do you any harm.

You’ve managed to go two weeks without so much as a nibble of chocolate, so why can’t you reward yourself with a curry and half a tub of ice cream?

Or perhaps you have done some research on making money on the internet, bought an ebook or two and maybe even been on a seminar. But it all looks a little daunting, and besides, you don’t really have anything interesting to say anyway…

What you need at this stage is a way to stay motivated. And one of the keys to staying motivated is understanding the nature of momentum.

Let’s go play!

Imagine for a moment that you are in a children’s playground. Have you ever seen one of those small roundabouts, where a child can stand or sit on top, hold on to the bars and get spun around till they either fall off, get bored or throw up? Well, these roundabouts are not easy to get started. You have to push quite hard, especially if its a little rusty, to get it moving. Both hands, often running around in a circle to get it up to speed. Even then, it’s a little slow, right? “Faster!” cry the kids as they cling easily to the bars.

So you push even harder. The spinning gets faster. The kids start screaming and their knuckles get whiter as they grip the bars tightly.

Suddenly, you find you can stop running. You can even stop pushing. You can stand still, catch your breath and just admire your efforts. As long as you give it the occasional nudge, sometimes just with a finger, the momentum of the roundabout takes care of things for you.

The point is, if you are looking to change something in your life, whether it is your financial situation, your love life or your health, you have to start with a HUGE push. It may be tiring, it may seem like a long time, but if you push hard enough and for long enough, sure enough, the change you are wanting to shift into or away from your experience eventually takes on a life of its own. You still have to poke at it with a regular nudge or two, just to keep yourself on track. But the really hard work has been done.

Don’t go looking for the easy way.

Do you really get the fastest results in the shortest possible time with the least amount of effort?

Of course not. That is where the myth of the “quick-fix” lies.

But now that you understand the momentum of the playground, start thinking of your own personal challenges in the same way. Don’t be afraid of the effort you have to put in at the beginning just to get things moving. The hours you spend setting up a website or writing content. The weeks it takes just to lose a few pounds. The months you spend focusing on other people’s needs instead of your own.

The books you have to read. The truths you must face about yourself. The people you need to get out and meet….

It’s all about making an effort. And if you get bored, or lazy and sit back and stop before the momentum of the roundabout is ready to take over from you, it can be more exhausting than ever just to get it started again.

The key is to enjoy the effort. Don’t think of it as a chore, like a wall to be knocked over and demolished. You’ll be more aligned with what you want when your effort is positive and optimistic and full of anticipation of the momentum you are creating. If you are pursuing change in favour of what you are passionate about, then I guarantee that you will LOVE, even miss, the pushing part.

(This doesn’t mean you can eventually sit back and do nothing though – we all know that if you stop pushing a roundabout, eventually it slows down and stops altogether.)

Just start using momentum to your advantage. Visualise the roundabout when the going gets tough, when you are tempted to sit down and stop too soon.

Use it to manage the way you look at change, and just keep pushing with anticipation and joy and always with a huge smile on your face, until your problem literally flies out of your hands.

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