fears

Have you ever used one of those draught excluders that look like long snakes? They lie across the floor along the bottom of gappy doors to stop the cold air sneaking inside.

When I lived in the UK, these snakes were really important, especially in those deep winter nights when the tip of my nose would start to ice over.

I could snuggle up in bed, safe in the knowledge that the nasty frigid air could never penetrate the defences of my trusty door snake.

That was until the one night I needed to get up in the night to use the loo. I grumbled about in the chilly darkness feeling for the bedroom door, and tugged it open, forgetting that my snake was lying in front of it.

Thus – with a squelch, my door snake was jammed tight beneath the door and the floor, leaving a gap barely wide enough to pass my arm through.

What to do?

I tried pushing the door closed again to dislodge the snake, but it was so firmly wedged beneath the door that no amount of tugging and yanking would work. It simply rolled underneath it.

I was trapped. Couldn’t go out, and no-one could get in. It was dark. It was cold. And I was standing there desperate to pee.

All kinds of uncomfortable. Frustrating. Feeling stuck, jittery and helpless and desperate.

Now imagine for a moment that you too have a trusty door snake, but it’s inside your head.

It holds all of your reasons for doing what you have always done. Stuffed with reassuring familiarity. With habits. With fear and with insecurity and vulnerability. With regrets. Outright lies, even.

Stuffed tight.

And you arrange your Trusty Door Snake of Reasons along the bottom of the drafty door of your world, as it valiantly works to beat away the cold and the fear and keep your confidence from icing over.

Until one night you have a dream of something big!

And in this dream there is such an urgency! Your big idea – your need to do your thing – shakes you from your sleep.

You almost throw yourself at the door, desperate to fly away like a bird against a window.

You grasp in the dark for the door handle and pull.

But no! Your trusty snake locks you in! It hisses as you try to drag the door over its back. “Don’t go out! Sssssssstay here where it’s warm and safe!”

Your snake is guarding you from failure. But it stops you from escaping your comfort zone only because you have put it there. So when the time comes to leave your room – when you are inspired and zapped with energy and you absolutely MUST get out NOW – it just gets in the way, lodging itself beneath your feet and snaking protectively around your ankles.

Don’t be left standing desperate at a half-open door unable to get out – invigorated – into the world!

How To Shift The Trusty Door Snake Who Is Now In Your Way

1. Acknowledge that your snake is only trying to protect you. Our barriers are formed slowly and carefully over time in order to prevent those achey stones-in-the-stomach called failure and shame. This is normal. It’s important to realise that your snake has only your best interests at heart – it’s just going about it the wrong way.
2. Show the snake some gratitude. It has done an excellent job of keeping the draughts away from your toes while you were lying down. Now that you’re up and ready for action, it’s time to say thank you. Thank you my trusty door snake, for preserving the toastiness that has allowed me to incubate my fizzy sleep-shaking muse. You have done good. Indeed, you have done awesome. But now it’s time to let me and my idea out.
3. Move your snake before you try to escape. If you don’t take the time to move your snake out of the way before you go charging at the door, you risk being tripped up, or worse, unable to get out at all. When we’re inspired to take action, our limiting beliefs and fears can surprise us by suddenly wedging themselves in the gap between where we are and where we eagerly want to go. Instead, it will help you to see your snake, say thanks, and then gently put it to the side. This doesn’t mean you have to remove it entirely. Just nudge it away enough to give you the space to move forward.
4. If your snake gets stuck in the door, massive action is required. Jiggling and tentative tugging won’t work. You need an enormous push to roll over the snake. You need momentum.  Ask for help at this point if you need it. Summon every sinew in prising open the door wide enough for your action to pass.

The best part about a snake like Trusty is that you know he’s there for you should be overtaken by the need to hibernate under the duvet. We all have moments like this, where the cold becomes unbearable and the only comfort is a snuggly bed and the reassuring, safe warmth of the familiar. We don’t have to go charging into the cold and dark with a bold idea every night. But when we feel the need to launch into the unknown, it’s good to know that we don’t have to be trapped by the very thing we put in place to keep us cosy.

Comments – Sing It Back To Me

Tell me the name of your Trusty Door Snake! (And does it have more than one?) And I want you to share your brilliant awake-in-the-night Idea that is begging to be set free too – then we can all talk nicely to each other’s Snakes and send them away to slither joyously together somewhere else. Hooray!

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